Believe it or not, as kids Doug and I had another sizable collection of toys that I have yet to tell you about on this blog. Besides all of our actions figures we also had a bunch of Lego blocks. We were never hardcore Lego kids so we didn’t have a ton of it but we had enough. Doug collected Space Lego. This was long before they got into aliens and water planets and all that other crazy stuff. Doug’s was very generic space Lego. Most of the pieces were blue and white and the men were simple little astronauts with a swirly Saturn logo on their chests. I collected Knight Lego. This was the very earliest of Knight Legos which predates dragons and skeletons and all that stuff. Mine was simple Knights and Horses and Castles. Our little brother Brian collected Pirate Lego and he ended up with the biggest collection of the three of us.
Whenever Doug and I would play Lego together it always had to be a time-travel adventure. His spacemen would end up back in time so they could interact with my knights. The lot of them would usually end up having to fight off rubber dinosaurs or something since we didn’t have any bad guys. It was fun building and playing with those sets but I was the type of kid that once a set was built I never wanted to take it apart again. It was just so much work to build that damn castle. I think Doug and I eventually handed down all of our Legos to Brian who ended up with a nice diverse collection. I’m not sure where it all ended up once Brian was done with it.
This guy here is the only piece of Lego that I have left and he isn’t even one of the ones from childhood. I swiped this guy from another kid’s science fair project in junior high.
I remember a bunch of science fair projects were sitting on the back counter in our science class. Somebody had made the classic paper mache volcano. They had decorated it by making a little village full of Lego men at the base of the Volcano. In a way I suppose you could say that I rescued this guy from a pretty nasty fate of drowning in river of molten baking soda. Me and my friends had picked a bunch of Lego men off the volcano and were goofing around with them in the back of the classroom. We pulled them apart and swapped their pieces, that’s why this guy is kind of Frankenstein’ed with his yellow and black two-toned pants and his weird red glove. He’s sporting one of those classic Saturn logo astronaut shirts which is pretty cool. After I brought this guy home I gave him one of my old knight shields that I found laying around. It’s hard to review a Lego man because what can you really say? He’s not exactly cool looking but he is functional. I like how his feet stick to any other Lego surface and how his head can be stuck to other pieces via the peg on top.
But that’s what makes this guy worth talking about, that’s why I’ve held onto him all these years. He doesn’t have a peg on top of his head. On that fateful day in the back of science class I remember we were picking up our big heavy phone book sized Science text books and dropping them on top of our Lego men. I’m not sure why exactly, I think the goal was to launch the figures across the room and we were competing to see who could shoot their Lego man the farthest. This abuse is probably why this guys face is rather worn. So after several trips across the room my mismatched little man was placed back at the center of my desk in preparation for another voyage. I stood him up straight, held my book flat about 2 feet above him and dropped it. Only this time my Lego man didn’t go flying. The book dropped square on his head and he remained standing. We were all in shock at how perfect the drop must have been. This teeny little Lego dude absorbed the impact and was now balancing this giant book on top of his head. Maybe it’s not a big deal but we were amazed by it. When we lifted the book off we found that the text book and collapsed his head peg, pushing it down into his smiley little skull. This little man earned my respect that day and that is why I chose to rescue him from his volcanic fate and have kept him with me ever since. I’d like to see one of those fancy new Star Wars Lego characters pull that off. 6 out of 10.